Sonic #39 [Oct 1996]
     Spaz/Harvo cover: "Mecha Madness begins here."  Personally I
can't understand why Mecha-Sonic has the fan following that he
appears to have.  Still, he's getting his shot and it starts off
with yet another potential poster for a cover.
     "Rage Against The Machine" [five parts!]
     Story: Mike Gallagher; Art: Pat Spaziante
     Welcome to "Wild Kingdom."  I'm Jack Hannah.  Today we
observe the Mobian hedgehog.  It's well-known that hedgehogs curl
themselves up into a ball to discourage attackers.  This behavior
is also useful when throwing tantrums, as Sonic appears to be
doing when a decision by the Freedom Fighters meeting in session
doesn't go his way.  Sonic has just proposed that he allow
himself to be roboticized with a neuro-override to counteract the
effect on his mind so he can trash Robotnik.  Freddy Mendez's
editorial box doesn't exactly say "Been there, done that," but
does serve to remind us of the plot of "Steel-Belted Sally"
[#29].  Rotor's objections are seconded by Bunnie, who literally
puts her foot down.  And when a partially roboticized rabbit puts her foot down you can read it
on the Richter scale.  Realizing he's got about as much chance of
his plan being accepted as Pat Buchanan has of being the
Republican candidate for President, Sonic storms out of the
meeting.  Anyone else notice the piece of paper with the words
"is a dweeb" attached to Antoine's nameplate?  We may have some
dissention in the ranks, but Antoine's offhanded questioning of
Sonic's loyalty draws a sharp rebuke from Sally.
     To work off his frustration, Sonic heads for a "new training
facility" in the Great Forest, conveniently located next door to
the "Knothole Jail".  Make that SERIOUS dissention; the existence
of such a structure not only has never been hinted at before, but
seems kinda incongruous when we're talking about FREEDOM
Fighters.  Anyway, Sonic no sooner walks in the door than he goes
through the quick cooldown routine: Nack the Weasel drops a
barbell on Sonic's head and the blue dude does that stars in the
eyes thing.  Why didn't Nack use an Acme(tm) anvil and make it
official while he was at it?  Picking up the plot of the Triple
Trouble issue where he left off, he ties up Sonic for delivery to
Robotnik.
     Upon arriving at Robotnik's, Nack informes the big guy that 
he won't turn Sonic over until he's been paid.  He also
asks for a company car, his own dressing room and $100,000 per episode. 
Robotnik's counteroffer is that Nack gets to leave Robotropolis
alive, and he brings in a giant Crabmeat bot as a dealmaker. 
Nack sees the fairness in this arrangement and goes off to
represent the cast members of "Friends" in contract negotiations. 
Without further ado, Sonic is transformed into Mecha-Sonic.  His
assignment: level Knothole.
     OK, now we get to the good part.  Mecha-Sonic's initial
attack is blunted when he's confronted with multiple holographic
images of the Freedom Fighters to shoot at.  And who should
arrive on the scene but a seriously-upgraded Bunnie as this
starts looking more like a Mortal Kombat plotline.  Bunnie's upgrades appear to include the
ability to fly and a dictionary of Southern cliches.  She advises Mecha-Sonic to "surrender like the
Yankees at Chickamauga" but Mecha-Sonic reacts by doing his one-robot impression of Pickett's
Charge.  Bunnie telescopes her legs and gets out of the way.  While the bot and the rabbot
move on to a re-enactment of the battle between the Monitor and the Merrimac, Sally puts in a
call for help, which Tails relays from Knothole in a burst of technobabble.  By the end of the page
Sally is speaking in tongues herself.
     And now's a good time to pause and catch our breath.  You may tour the Sonic Art
gallery or while away some time scouring the "Find Your Name In Print Page."  Don't forget to
visit the gift shop.
     Back to the story.  Robotnik has been monitoring the fight.  Apparently inspired by that
lightning rod bit in "The Rise of Robotropolis..." [#38], Robotnik sends a current through Sonic
and into Bunnie.  Though dazed and quoting Tennessee Williams, Bunnie tries putting
Mecha-Sonic out of action with a "pulse cannon".  Makes me long for the good old days when the
Freedom Fighters were going up against SWATbots armed only with slingshots and paint balls
("Sally's Crusade: The Quest", In Your Face #1).  Mecha-Sonic decides to wrap up this Civil War
re-enactment by playing Sherman to Bunnie's Atlanta.  She hits the ground in considerably worse
shape than Kelli Skrug after her second vault in the Olympics.  Now there seems to be nothing
standing between Mecha-Sonic and a soon-to-be flattened Knothole.
     Tails, meanwhile, has been briefing a familiar silhouette: Knuckles.  Propelled into the air
by some sort of ejector mechanism, Knuckles may not have any fancy weaponry but he does have
a grudge against what used to be Sonic.  The confrontation, however, is predictably one-sided. 
With both Bunnie and Knuckles out of commission, Sally orders "Operation Last Resort" -- and I
don't think she's talking about retreating to Cancun.
     Now THIS is more like it, campers!  You've got Spaziante's amazing artwork and a linear
script by Gallagher that's easy on the quips.  Though some of the lines are unforgivable.  Sally's
spouting of babytalk, for instance.  I thought this bit about treating Tails like a kid was wrapped
up in "Southern Crossover."  Also, Sally's always struck me as having way too much class for that
sort of thing.  The ONLY way I could see it happening would be if Sally got an earful of Tails'
speech in the preceeding panel and (with a broad wink) decided to bring him down one shoe size. 
In any event, we'll have to wait until the Mecha Madness special to resolve this plot.  And
considering that this issue only just hit the local comic stands this past weekend, I have to hope I'll
get to see it without ordering it.  Come to think of it, I NEVER DID receive Sonic #38 in the
mail!  Archie Comics, better run a Level One diagnostic on your distribution system.
     Sonic-Grams: my initial reaction to Eric Kessler's dedication to Richard Egner: "Gee, who
died?"  Probably refers to some intern moving on within the company, though I speak under
correction.  Fred pumps the Mecha Madness issue, which will also feature a Forty Fathom
Freedom Fighters story and a Chaotix solo shot.  In response to one letter, Tails is credited with
attaining an altitude of 1,000 feet, Sonic lists a top speed of Mach 2 as a hedgehog, Warp 1 as a
bot, and they get it all wrong when asking if Sonic or Tails is related to Sally--it's Sonic and
Tails themselves who relate to each other like sibs.  Brian Edwards asks if Sally will get her own
series; while Sonic professes that Sal isn't interested, those of us who have read Ken Pender's
posts about reader demographics know better.  Once more, Sonic's speed is attributed to the fact
that he was "born that way."
     All in all, the coolness of this issue has been amply justified.  Double-bag this one while
waiting for the Mecha Madness special to hit the stands.  I'll be waiting to see IF it hits the stands. 
In one place around here there were still issues of #35 for sale when #37 first came out, and to
this day another store has an orphan copy of Sonic & Knuckles #1 in its comic rack.  Better make
that a Level Two diagnostic!