Sonic #109 [June 2002]
     Spaz/Ribiero/Ray Cover: We know the cover says this is "The
World's Most Way Past Cool Comic" but this is ridiculous!  Not a
bad bit of drawing, actually, with Sonic acting the part of the
book's narrative sense during 2001: adrift with no sense of
direction.

     "I Herd It Through The Pipeline"
     Story: Benny Lee; Art: Ron Lim; Ink: Andrew Pepoy and Pam
Eklund; Color: Josh and Aimee Ray; Lettering: Jeff Powell;
Editor: J. F. Gabrie; Managing Editor: Victor Gorelick; Editor-
in-Chief: Richard Goldwater.
     After a rather stunning J. Axer splash page, we find Sonic
telling Rotor "You look way bummed out."  Thanks, we needed that;
Ron Lim's work is not the most emotionally expressive.  Anyway,
the big guy is reminiscing about his mom and little brother,
whose herd came under the control of Dr. Robotnik for the second
time in S85's "Home and Back" (the first time was in the "Tundra
Road" arc, S31-32).  Sonic starts to suggest something, with
Sally finishing his thought as if they were a married couple
already: road trip with the Sword of Acorns.  They head for the
still-conspicuous castle where Sally is momentarily stunned when
the Sword (or as the late Kodos called it, "Suh-wooooord!") talks
to her.  You'd think that after all the hours she's logged with
Nicole, Sally would be used to conversing with inanimate objects. 
Anyway, Bunnie comes along for the ride.
     However mediocre Lim's artwork when it comes to the main
characters, you can't fault his design for vehicles; the four
Freedom Fighters take a snazzy-looking sub north, following a
pipeline lying on the ocean floor.  Unfortunately, Robotnik is
keeping an eye on them and tells Robo-Sniv to "activate the 'sea'
crete weapon!"  Not the easiest pun in the world but it does the
job.  Anyway, the aforementioned weapon is a robo-sea serpent
that wraps itself around the sub with intent to crush.  Sonic and
the gang escape in bubble-like escape pods which bob to the
surface like ping pong balls.
     See if you can spot the problem in the following
novelization of this story:

     ...As the sub began breaking apart, they managed to escape
the sea creature in their escape pods.  An instant later, they
were bobbing on the surface of the ocean.
     Once they reached the drilling site....

     Kinda abrupt, isn't it?  I'm going to be charitable and
blame it on the fact that Lee only had eleven pages to work with
and the J. Axer splash page was just too cool to lose.  Anyway,
Sonic and crew arrive at an oil rig where Robotnik's visage is on
display courtesy of some floating vid screens; hey, at least it's
not a Big Giant Floating Head again!  Robotnik doesn't seem to
know that the gang has escaped from the robo-sea serpent, or that
the U.S. Senate recently voted against drilling in the Arctic
National Wildlife Refuge.  While Sonic and Bunnie deal with the
local bots, Sally gets possessed by the Sword and liberates the
herd while Rotor blows up the rig.  Rotor is reunited with his
family, and everyone heads over to Rotor's mom's place to try and
figure out how to get back home since their sub was trashed.
     HEAD: I'm keeping in mind that Benny Lee is still one of the
new kids on the block and this is only his second story for
Sonic.  It's a good basic outing for the characters, if you can
forgive the gaping plot hole in the middle.  I mean, we don't
even know how close/far away from land they were when they bobbed
to the surface in those bubbles, let alone how far inland the
drilling rig was.  But that whole "Once we got to the oil rig..."
segue comes awfully close to being unforgivable.  Let's keep an
eye out for that sort of thing, Editorial.  You couldn't let the
crossword puzzle gather dust and given Lee one extra page in
order to write a better story?  Head Score: 6.
     EYE: Maybe I'm just getting used to it, but Lim's style
isn't that jarring this time around.  He actually manages to get
Sally's proportions more under control; see page 3 panels 1 and
4, and page 9 panel one.  Wish I could say the same about Rotor,
whose head starts deflating toward the end of the story.  And Ron 
still has a LONG way to go when it comes to doing convincing
facial expressions.  Giving Rotor eyelids on pages 1 and 2 seems
to be the only way he can have Rotor express an emotion.  Then
again, how many chances did Ron have to do facial expressions
when he was drawing the Silver Surfer?  And aside from the
midnight sunset in the next-to-last panel, I have to say that the
coloring team of Ray and Ray are having trouble clearing the bar
set by Frank Gagliardo.  Eye Score: 5.
     HEART: One of the problems with a short action piece is that
the action has to happen SO fast that it's difficult to set a
proper emotional pace, especially when the action is the
centerpiece.  Rotor being reunited with his people is supposed to
be the culminating moment of this story, but there was just
something ... I don't know ... empty about it.  It was sort of a
foregone conclusion that Sonic would prevail, of course, but
that's not the problem exactly.  Once more Lee works at showing
the Freedom Fighters functioning as a team and that's a plus, but
otherwise this story was about as cold as the setting.  To call
the ending "heartwarming" would be a serious stretch.
     I don't know why I should feel I have to apologize for the
way the story turned out.  Maybe because to me the story points
out one of the harsh realities of writing something like this:
just because there's a devoted audience out there that cares
about the characters, you can't assume that you'll never have to
work at MAKING the reader care about the plight they're in. 
That's one of the twin objectives of storytelling: not only
telling a good story, but leaving your readers/listeners wanting
more because they've come to CARE about the characters and what
happens to them.  I'll have more to say about this below.  Heart
Score: 7.

     Sonic Crossword Puzzle, plus the Knuckles Family Tree on the
facing page.  Uh, when did Knuckles get violet eyes?

     Sonic Fan Art: Nice concept in Stefano Cimino's drawing of
Sonic in close-up, and Marie Schroeder answers an age-old
question.  Maybe Sonic should consult Lindesfarne Dewclaw over at
kevinandkell.com for suggestions on how hedgehogs cope with
clothes.

     "The Crush"
     Story: Karl Bollers; Art: J. Axer; Ink: Andrew Pepoy and Pam
Eklund; Color: John and Aimee Ray; Lettering: Jeff Powell;
Editor: J. F. Gabrie.
     Mina tears off after Sonic, who's doing some tearing around
himself, but hits a mini-speed bump in the form of a small rock. 
Student driver/runner that she is, she starts to pitch forward,
but Sally makes the save.  Good hands, Sal, considering how fast
Mina was supposed to be going.
     The two end up conversing about Sonic, with Mina feeling
seriously out of the loop.  She manages to bring up the Huge
Misunderstanding Scene from S99's "Blow By Blow" and Sally is
properly enlightened as to the one-sidedness of any relationship
between Sonic and Mina.  "What makes him tick?" Mina asks Sally. 
In response, we get a one-page summation of Sonic's personality. 
Seems that the trademark coolness is only one facet to him. 
There are allusions to his loyalty, his being headstrong enough
to tell it like it is to King Max (I seem to remember Ken Penders
wanting Dr. Quack to fill that particular job description, but
never following through on it), and his devotion to his "little
bro," Tails.  Sally as much as admits that she doesn't understand
life on Planet Sonic any better than Mina, "but I've never
stopped trying."  Mina does a curtsey without realizing that it
works better with a skirt, then takes off.  Sally smiles in
satisfaction that this moronic plot point is FINALLY over!
     HEAD: According to the realities of comic book scheduling,
it's likely that this story was written and locked down maybe six
months ago, a scant few issues after "Blow by Blow."  That means
that it wasn't all that long after that story appeared, followed
by whatever responses arrived by e-mail or snail mail.  Which
means that it didn't take all that long after the story's
appearance for the Powers That Be at Archie Comics to FINALLY
realize the fatal contradiction inherent in the Romantic Triangle
Plot Point.
     All along, ever since the book's introduction, Archie has
insisted long and loud that this was a book aimed at a pre-
adolescent boy audience.  This is a demographic for whom
"romance" ranks below "lima beans" on the list of Favorite
Things.  The fans, however, refused to cooperate and Sonic
eventually acquired a teen following.  Editorial then decided
that whoever is in charge of the flagship comics might be able to
advise them on a plot point that would help cement the teen
readers.  Some suit with thumbtacks rattling around inside his
skull suggested "Romantic Triangle."
     I don't know why nobody could see it coming.  The comic was
expected to go from "No way!" romance to two-way romance without
a break.  Karl Bollers's inability to make this plot point work
was in direct proportion to the level of contradiction that
Management expected him to resolve.  In the end, quite frankly,
he couldn't make it happen.  I don't know anybody who could.
     An alternate title for this story could have been
"Independence Day" because we're free at last from a plot point
that never got any traction.  Which may explain why Karl was able
to write such a compact, workable, satisfying little 5-pager. 
The weight of the contradiction was off his shoulders!  He could
breathe again!  Management did him, and all the readers, a favor
by realizing that it was time to take that plot point out back by
the dumpsters and club it to death.  
     And am I ever glad that whoever composes the blurbs for the
back of the book got it wrong!  Last month's teaser for this
story left the impression that the Suh-wooooord of Acorns would
figure into this story somehow.  Mercifully it didn't.  Instead,
we get Sally and Mina talking things out and reaching that which
we've rarely seen in the comic lately: a satisfactory conclusion.
     And remember, it couldn't have happened without you, the
readers.  This misbegotten editorial edict would still be alive
and kicking if the fans hadn't opened up and had their say.  Well
done, people.  Head Score: 10.
     EYE: Last things first: look at the last panel on the last
page.  There's nothing nasty or double-edged about Sally's smile. 
She's relieved, sure, but I can't help but believe that she also
wishes Mina well, that she holds no grudge against her.  
     I also can't help but believe that Ron Lim couldn't do a
drawing that expressive even with a gun to his head.
     Never has the differences in talent been so obvious.  Ron's
art has simply never worked in this comic.  Axer, on the other
hand, is totally at ease drawing the characters.  They have a
sense of reality so strong the question of whether they're on-
model never comes up, even with that weirdly impossible yet
natural-looking gesture of Mina's on page 2 panel 2.
     And the same can be said for his layouts.  Almost every page
of "I Herd It Through The Pipeline" is a collection of panels on
a page, which gets the job done.  But Axer's playing a whole
'nother game.  On page 2 the second and third panels are overlaid
on what could have been a splash page.  Almost all the pages have
that feel; the final page has Mina gesturing her way out of the
panel as almost all panels are set against a skyscape.  This is
what's called "thinking outside the box," and I bless Axer for
it.
     Even Ray and Ray seem to have done better work here than
they did in "Pipeline."  Their skies shift from blue to a kind of
lavender that we only saw in the next-to-last panel of
"Pipeline."  It's ALL good here.  Eye Score: 10.
     HEART: Until Ken Penders does a Data Sheet of Sonic, I
submit that page 4 of this story will do just fine.  Sure, it
leads off with the coolness factor, but there's more to the blue
dude than his attitude.  He's depicted as a complex individual,
by turns forthright and funny, cool and caring.  It does justice
to a character who, in lesser hands, would have become as one-
dimensional as the Riverdale Crowd long ago.
     And it says a lot for Sal that she can see far more in him
than Mina does, who has yet to get past Sonic's speed and
attitude.  Of course as the third panel on page 4 implies,
they've done a whole lot more than go to the malt shop together. 
There's nothing like putting your life in someone else's hands to
forge a relationship.
     This little story feels a lot like the "interlude" episodes
of some anime.  It's a chance to dial down the action and flesh
out the characters either by providing back story or else by
filling out their emotional resume.  The "Holly's Birthday" ep of
Monster Rancher and the "Genesis of Evil" ep from Digimon are two
examples.  The latter is a serious weepie: Ken, formerly emperor
of the Digital World, is tearfully reunited not only with his
parents but with Leafmon, Wormmon's hatchling stage.  I'm not
saying that every story in the comic has to be like this one, but
throwing one of these into the book every now and then helps
build rapport, helps the reader to understand and to care about
the characters and thus, with a little luck, further cement the
bonds of fandom.  Heart Score: 10.

     "Reunification: The Conclusion"
     Story: Ken Penders; Art: Dawn Best; Layouts: Ken Penders;
Ink: Ken Penders; Coloring: Ray and Ray; Lettering: Vickie
Williams; Editor: Justin Gabrie.
     Let's see, where were we?  Oh, yes: Disembodied Voice just
called Somebody a traitor or words to that effect, and Lara-Su
walks into the Council chamber in time to see Constable Remington
aim at We Don't Know Who.  Places, everyone!  Action!!
     Somebody draws a weapon and fires.  Lara-Su, one row back in
the gallery, says "You won't kill him this time, Remington!" 
Probably because Somebody beats the Constable to it.  It LOOKS
like Somebody was aiming at Dimitri and Knuckles took the hit. 
Lara-Su berates herself; "Where did I get it wrong?"  Probably
because you didn't read up on Echidna Conspiracy Theory #27: The
Second Gunman Theory.  "Sounds like you have a lot to tell,"
Remington says to her, "which I will be very interested in
hearing ... so I'll just walk away and turn my back on you so you
can waltz your suspicious self on out of here."  Between the
Constable and Geoffrey "The Interrogator" Sinjin we could have a
Keystone Kops revival on our hands here.  Oh, wait a minute, I'm
talking to Gen Xers: the Keystone Kops were a slapstick bunch of
police officers who were part of the Mack Sennett comedies during
the silent film era (Sennett was in charge of Keystone Studios
from 1912-1917).  Their basic shtick was to crash into and fall
all over each other while answering the call of justice.
     Lien-Da does a quick CSI overview of the body.  We then get
a mental aside from her that the hit went down a little ahead of
schedule.  Dimitri and the Mitre confer on this turn of events
and agree that "extremism on either side will serve neither
cause."  Tell it to the Palestinians and the Israelis, bud! 
Locke, or a reasonable facsimile thereof, steps in to mediate
while Lien-Da slinks out of there.
     Lara-Su is outside, crying her violet eyes out, when Julie-
Su runs past.  Lara-Su, however, is distracted by Lien-Da's
radioing to Syntar, a Legion sniper.  Lien-Da orders him to kill
Somebody, and while he's at it drop Julie-Su for laughs.  Neither
happens because Lara-Su clocks him.  Her head still swimming with
plot possibilities, she's whisked back to her own time period.
     Julie-Su, meanwhile, is reunited with the still-very-much-
alive Knuckles.  Seems that he knew he'd recover from being shot
and wanted to do something dramatic to win Dimitri over.
     "Back in the future," (ouch!) Lara-Su confesses to her mom
that she failed to prevent her dad's death.  No, kid, you failed
to stick around to see what actually happened!  So everyone can
forget Julie-Su's offhand reference to "an alternate reality." 
Turns out that Julie-Su wasn't playing straight with Lara-Su
anyway: Knuckles, we learn, is alive and evil and in charge of
the Dark Legion.  Julie-Su explains this as she grabs a weapon
and her purse, though it could be an ammo bag for all I know, and
enlists her daughter's help.
     HEAD: Well, THAT didn't end as expected, which is par for
the course in a Ken Penders story.  I don't know why I expected
anything different this time.  I thought, in my review of S106,
that Ken was delivering "a short and to-the-point story that
brings things back to what passes for normal around these parts." 
But NOOOOOOO!!  This is a Ken Penders story, after all, and he
jumps feet-first into the pool with a suitcase full of plot
twists, miscommunication, secrets kept, and a red herring the
size of Moby Dick (the reference to "alternate realities" which
we'd all do well to forget).
     So four installments later, where are we?  Knuckles is still
alive, as is Kragok, as is the scheming Lien-Da, and we get a
hint that Ken has the Knuckles As Ultimate Villain plot in the
cooler waiting to be thawed out.  I had thought ... OK, I had
HOPED ... that Ken would have dropped that UV nonsense and gone
for something a little more workable.  But Ken will do as he will
do.
     I can understand where he's coming from, and why he chooses
to practice the hoodoo known as Loose Continuity.  It's part of a
writer's craft, especially if the writer wishes to remain
employed.
     Like Michael Dorsey, the Dustin Hoffman character from
"Tootsie" who as an actor believed in nothing except
unemployment, Loose Continuity exists because of a belief that
leaving loose threads dangling in a story enables a writer to
keep a story line going beyond its normal lifespan because a
writer can graft a new story onto it.  Example: we know that
Mammoth Mogul, imprisoned in the Master Emerald back in S56's
"Immortality Is Infinite..." was sprung from said bauble back in
S79's "The Chaos Factor."  And thanks to Loose Continuity he's
still waiting in the wings for a chance to be used by Lee or
Bollers or Penders or ... nobody.
     I don't have any experience as a comic book writer, but as a
fanfic writer with 19 Sonic stories to my name, I can state from
personal experience that it's at least as much work to come up
with an idea that incorporates an existing plot point as it is to
come up with something fresh.  The last few fanfics I've done
have been based on Archie plots, sure, but I wrote them as a way
to show the fans how to do the thing right!  I can't demonstrate
this to the writers themselves, who are forbidden by professional
standards from reading fan stories for fear that I'd get it into
my brain at some point that rather than be flattered that they
used an idea of mine and actually made the comic better I'd haul
their butts into court expecting something more tangible than
bragging rights.  Bottom line, I don't care for Loose Continuity
because I think leaning on it too much makes a writer lazy and
really doesn't make the workload lighter anyway.
     Enough of the griping.  This story did OK until the last
page, when Ken did his usual bit of jumping out from behind the
bushes and yelling "Psych!"  As for what's to come, I had thought
that Ken would be working up a story of political intrigue and a
battle for succession within the Dark Legion as Lien-Da angles
her curves up toward the top slot.  No mention of that in the
blurbs, or in the text box at the end of this story.  Maybe it's
just as well that Ken's going to let the engine cool down for 4
issues.  That way, Julie-Su and Lara-Su can get even more
confused.  I mean, the lines of communication aren't as crossed
as they COULD be; the last time they were really bad, the Capulet
family crypt was tending toward overcrowded.  Head Score: 7.
     EYE: Dawn Best's artwork again gives the plot something
solid to hang on to.  I have to wonder about the future Julie-
Su's dress, though; I know it's supposed to be a zipper line of
some sort, but it looks like the lacework on a nightie.  Eye
Score: 9.
     HEART: I found it curious that this story didn't do anything
for me emotionally.  At least I should have felt for Lara-Su's
plight, wanting to prevent her father's assassination and
ultimately failing.  But I didn't.  Maybe because Ken psyched us
out not only as to the identity of the true would-be assassin,
but also by throwing one more death cheat at us.  Or maybe I'm
just plain fatigued by the story.  I can only take so much of the
Ken Penders style.  I mean, I'm still waiting for something to
HAPPEN!!  And by "something happening" I don't mean someone
getting shot or punched in the head, both of which occurred in
this story.  I'm talking about something that has a direct and
immediate impact on the storyline as a whole, something that
moves it toward some kind of denouement or that at least gives
the illusion of development.
     But obviously Ken has no intention of doing that just yet,
despite my hope back in S106 that he might be moving in that
direction at long last.  Let me be honest here: the longer this
state of affairs drags on month after month, the harder it is for
me to care, let along remember all the twists and turns Ken has
built into the story.  Constable Remington's scene with Lara-Su
is highly symbolic: instead of placing her in immediate custody,
he more or less forgets all about her and walks away!  Any more
story arcs like this one and I just might want to join him. 
Heart Score: 5.

     This Just IN: Karl Bollers interviews J. Axer.  Frankly, I'd
rather he let his artwork do the talking.

     Sonic-Grams: Aussie Jonathan Dobbs wants to see more of the
Downunda Freedom Fighters; I wonder why.  And while I know I
should be pumped about Ken's including a portion of my review of
S106 as if it were a letter, the fact that the conclusion of the
Reunification arc more or less betrayed my hopes in it takes all
the joy out of it.

     As if things couldn't get any worse with the proofreading:

"'In Station Square Attacks' Robotropolis to get rid of the
threat of Dr. Robotnik once and for all."  

I defy anybody to parse that sentence in a way that demonstrates
that it makes sense.  Looks to me like a couple few words got
lost on their way through the word processor.  Sally's delayed
in-depth conversation with the Suh-wooooord is also slated for
next issue, as is a Pat Spaziante cover retrospective.