Knuckles #15 [Aug 1998]
     Spaz/Penders/Ray/Heroic Age cover: I'll admit it: when I
first saw the design for the cover I thought that the swarm of
Mobian Bees was on its way to Renfield's to avenge the death of
one of their own.  Hey, that COULD have been an interesting twist
in the story!  So we've got an absentee Knuckles in extreme
close-up, Vector, Mighty, Julie-Su in two places at once (because
some of her dreads have slopped over from last month's cover),
the aforementioned swarm, and a Charmy who's rather
uncharacteristically copping an attitude (given what awaits
inside this issue).  No sign of Espio (which proves nothing) or
Remington.  Interesting machine that Julie-Su's riding but it
can't hold a candle to the military hog on page 2 of Sonic #50
(and no, I'm NOT talking about Julian!).
     Credits page: one last time in case you forgot the other
two.  Having Charmy fly above the group makes him that much
easier to edit out.
     "The Chaotix Caper: Part 3
     "Picking Up The Pieces"
     Story: Ken Penders; Art: Manny Galan; Ink: Andrew Pepoy;
Color: Barry Grossman; Lettering: Vickie Williams: Editorial: G-Force.
     "Born to..." page: there's probably a nice picture of Julie-
Su under there somewhere.  And isn't it about time we lost the
description of her as an "echidna whose loyalties are uncertain"?
     There are few point-of-view shots more disturbing that the
one that opens this issue: one can only hope that Charmy was all
the way under for this one and that it wasn't done under local
anesthesia.  Which brings me to the topic of: Just what was the
medical basis for this story anyway?
     It's been established that Mello and Charmy both succumbed
to something in the chili sauce Renfield's been dishing out. 
It's something that didn't have anywhere near as lethal an effect
on anyone else (however hung over they may have felt later). 
This isn't such a far-fetched notion.  I've heard repeated
warnings from those in the know NEVER to feed chocolate to dogs:
the stuff contains an enzyme or something that the canine system
can't handle but that is easily assimilated by your everyday
humanoid chocaholic.  So we can theorize that the LSD in the
sauce is virulently toxic to bees.  And since it will be revealed
that Charmy has undergone abdominal surgery, I can only guess
that the stuff settled in his liver (assuming that Mobian bees
have livers) and threatened to shut down the whole works.  That
would be a plausible weak link in the gastric chain.  I also know
of a rather gruesome real-life example: The mother of a former
co-worker back in Chicago had been given "gold shots" (minute
amounts of actual gold in a liquid suspension) by a quack to
treat her arthritis.  The gold didn't do anything for the
arthritis--instead it accumulated in the liver and she died of
heavy metal poisoning.  Not a good way to go.
     OK, maybe I've thought more about the medical angle of the
story than the readers are supposed to, but how else to justify
the surgical scene in the beginning?  And besides, where's the
dramatic tension in simply having one's stomach pumped?
     Back to the surgery: the purple blood was a nice touch, even
though I didn't buy a word of the doctor's monologue.  Looks like
they forgot to invent the Hippocratic Oath.  But let's wander
away from this scene and turn our attention toward...
     Julie-Su getting thrown off a building!  At least we (if not
Downtown and his gang) finally learn why Julie-Su wears such
improbably thick boots: you can only fit so much into a utility
belt.  While in freefall she deploys her deus ex machina
(courtesy of Those Marvelous Toys, Inc., a division of Wayne
Enterprises) and pays an impromptu visit to Binny and the Mrs. 
Constable Remington intercepts her before she leaves the building
and, figuring she's had a hard enough day already, directs her to
an exit being guarded by only ONE of Downtown's goons.  The two
of them get into Harry's cab and instruct him to follow
Downtown's limo, secure in the belief that he won't notice
someone following him at 1:00 in the morning (according to the
clock on page 3).
     As Downtown phones ahead to the "Professor", his limo pulls
into a factory with the name "Axis".  Maybe it was as close to
"Acme" as they could get without Legal taking notice, I don't
know.
     There follows a baffling little bit of repartee between
Vector and his buds.  The croc seems more concerned about getting
a radio signal than anything else.  And when he DOES get a signal
it just HAPPENS to be a police band on which Remington is
relaying the latest plot developments.  Say it with me: "Gee,
What Are The Odds?"
     Remington and Julie-Su arrive at the factory, take out the
dingo night watchman (who's watching World Cup Soccer) and enter
the factory.  They observe Downtown talking to the Professor.  Of
all the times to start showing initiative, the P is asking for
one more day to whip up the latest batch of sauce.  Before
Downtown can ask Blackjack to communicate his displeasure
physically, a couple henchfurs ask where they should put all
these cases of incriminating evidence.  The trunk of Downtown's
limo, of course, is the ideal spot.
     By this time, what's left of the Chaotix have hitched a ride
in a truck and arrived at the scene.  They check in with Harry
then head for the factory.
     Inside, Downtown is in the process of shutting things down
when he detects the presence of an intruder.  Blackjack goes to
investigate, and Remington clobbers him with a 2 by 4; this just
makes Blackjack mad.  Downtown, in a burst of gunfire and bad
acting, starts shooting up the joint.  Julie-Su tries to get the
drop on him but it doesn't quite work out, but Espio decloaks and
disarms Downtown before he can pierce Julie-Su's ears or whatever
other part of her head may be close by.
     Meanwhile, Mighty has taken care of Blackjack, and
Downtown's moll "Foxie" tries to make a break for it but is
stopped by Homie the Croc.  Harry wisely keeps his carcass inside
his cab as the cavalry arrives.  Remington then confiscates
what's left of the secret sauce from Renfield's carnival.
     The End?  You haven't been paying attention.
     In what feels like a transition to another comic book
altogether, we segue to Haven, which is always good for a laugh. 
And we look in on the comedy stylings of Sabre and Locke. 
They're still wringing their mittens over Knuckles' "exhibition
of power" from the last issue.  For his part, Knuckles simply
expresses the wish to go home.  Immediately a wormhole opens on
command.  Don't know whether it IS a wormhole, really, but it
sounds more impressive than calling it "a McDonald playland
slide" as another reader recently did.  Without even tapping his
heels together or saying "There's no place like Echidnaopolis"
(which IS a mouthful!), Knuckles steps inside and vanishes.
     This sets up a dazzling display of stinkin' thinkin' on the
part of Sabre.  Rather than be impressed by his grandson's recent
achievements, he's concerned about the fact that Knuckles "is
displaying power similar to Dimitri's" and so he's got to report
the kid to the Brotherhood.
     Even leaving aside the fact that Dimitri/Enerjak siphoned
off the juice from eleven Chaos Emeralds to be able to pull off
what he did (see "Sense of History", part 2 in Sonic #35), you
have to wonder where Sabre is coming from.  It's clear to me that
Sabre didn't read enough comic books when he was growing up.  If
he had, he would have learned that there are superHEROES and
superVILLAINS, and that the simple possession of powers and
abilities far beyond those of mortal echidnas doesn't necessarily
have to translate into a desire to conquer and/or trash one's
homeworld.  Lara-Le would probably argue that if her ex had
bothered to teach Knuckles the Tomes along with history, math,
and the rest, Knuckles would have a clear idea of what
constitutes right and wrong and therefore Sabre would have no
reason to be so uptight (c.f. "The Other Road Taken" in Knuckles
#10).  Locke tries reasoning with his old man, but it falls on
deaf dreads.  Sabre's position on echidnas with super powers
would seem to be: "Shoot  em all and let Stan Lee sort  em out!" 
And of course Sabre insists on taking this to the Brotherhood
instead of telling his own son Locke to get his tail out of Haven
and start acting less like a Guardian and more like a father. 
Then again, Sabre would probably hesitate to go there since he
himself still has issues with his own father, Athair ("Covenant,"
Knuckles #11).  I'd be surprised if ANY of these jokers gets a
Father's Day card this year.
     And in ANOTHER shifting of gears, we see a variation on a
Type 6 Personnel Shuttle Craft from "Star Trek: The Next
Generation" landing near "Goldenhive Colony" on Mobius.  Charmy
and the Chaotix are accompanying Mello's body to its final
resting place.  The reunion between Charmy and his family could
have been a little more melodramatic--it's no Return Of The
Prodigal Son--but the simple funeral splash on page 20 strikes
just the right note.  When you're a teenager trying to duck your
responsibilities, goofing off can seem like a "great adventure." 
He then takes his leave of the Chaotix, to the dismay of some of
the fans, and is formally invested as Crown Prince of the Colony. 
Mello works in a celestial cameo appearance.
     This was a good story arc, and it was great to see Charmy
take center stage for a good portion of it.  He managed to do in
three issues what Sonic the Hedgehog has seriously avoided doing
for years in the comic: allow some of his interior life to leak
out and let the reader understand what makes him tick.  If
anything, we could've done with less of the "caper" part of the
story and been treated to more background about Charmy's
relations with his family and significant others.  I found myself
wondering why the suddenness of his running away, what had his
relationship with Safron been like, and through what process he
had gone to come to feel about his family the way he did about
the Chaotix.  But this IS a comic book and not a novel.
     Fistful of Letters:   No letters, no fan art, but a full-
page NiGHTS ad.  Knuckles #16: "Reunions"--it'll be interesting
to see the Brotherhood in action and to get an idea of how
dysfunctional they may be.  NiGHTS #4 (which I probably won't
review) and Sonic #62 (which some readers have already seen but
which won't land here until the end of the month--and today's the
17th).  And the Director's Cut of Sonic #50--Ken Penders has as
much as said that he expects I'll upgrade my opinion of the story
after having read it in its original form.  After the original
disaster of a year ago, that's probably a safe bet.